Chapter 34: Foodies Should Become Teachers

  "Class is starting now, I am your new teacher, Lei Dapeng... In college, brothers all called me Tianlei Ge, you can call me Teacher Lei."

  The book slammed onto the lectern, and Lei Dapeng began his opening remarks. No one laughed; they all looked at this new teacher with a mixture of tension, astonishment, and fear, as if they were witnessing an old cow giving birth to a small horse - utterly shocked, utterly amazed, and utterly terrified!

  "What's wrong with you? How can you stand up and say hello to the teacher like that?" Lei Dapeng glared, not getting the respect he deserved, and was quite angry.

  The class monitor hastily shouted "stand up", and the whole class said in unison: "Hello, Teacher Lei."

  Lei Dapeng was delighted and, as if greeting a leader, waved his hand: "Everyone, please sit down."

  The students sat down with a rustling sound, each one's back straight as a pen, their hands behind their backs, and at a glance, they were all well-behaved, one more so than the other.

  Lei Ge has always enjoyed this kind of shocking and astonishing feeling, from sitting in the corner of the classroom to finally upgrading to the podium, feeling extremely proud and satisfied, with a sense of superiority, pretending to be serious, walking back and forth on the podium like those stupid teachers used to do, turning around twice, scrutinizing the students in the whole class several times, looking at their pale and frightened faces, that vanity, is finally satisfied...

  One word: awesome!

  Two words: extremely cool!

  From young to old, his brother was always at the level of following others from behind, whether in studying or being naughty. He never thought that one day, so many people would look up to him and follow his lead... Lei Dapeng savored this refreshing feeling, his confidence almost bursting through the roof. Before starting the lesson, he had to solidify his long-held ideals, tapping on the desk and asking the students:

  "Who got first place in the class, stand up."

  The atmosphere was not good, the students looked at each other in dismay, and many eyes were cast towards a small girl in the second row. The little girl seemed to be afraid, slowly standing up. Teacher Lei's appearance was enough to make most people of the opposite sex feel fearful, especially minors.

  The ideal is about to be realized, Lei Dapeng is ready to pick up the bad habit of training this excellent student, but unexpectedly, at this station, Lei Dapeng's heart suddenly fell.

  This is vastly different from the goody-goody students that her teacher liked back in school. All she saw was a young girl with a brush-like haircut, tied up with a red ribbon, with a dull and lifeless complexion, eyes that dared not look people straight in the eye, and a thin and frail body that didn't match her age. If Lei Ge were to name her, calling her "Bitter Melon Flower" wouldn't be an exaggeration at all.

  He's in a dilemma. Leigang has always been fearless of the powerful and not afraid of strong forces, but for such underprivileged people, he can't keep scolding and criticizing them, that's not the chivalrous spirit.

  "What's your name?" Lei Dapeng asked, his tone gentle, his own ideals forgotten, a strange sense of pity rising in his heart.

  "It's beautiful." The girl said timidly, her voice barely audible.

  Lei Dapeng was stunned for a moment, and then he didn't know how to react. It wasn't until then that he noticed it was already mid-summer, but the little girl was still wearing thick spring clothes. He turned his head and saw that her shoes were worn out, with toes sticking out. The young girl looked older than middle-aged women due to her outdated attire. Lei Dapeng couldn't help but stare and asked: "You... why are you dressed like this? Doesn't your mom dress you up?"

  Lei Dapeng was at a loss. The little girl didn't make a sound, her face looked even more difficult, someone explained for her, a wild kid in the back row shouted: "Teacher, she has no mother."

  Lei Dapeng was taken aback and scolded: "Nonsense, who gave birth to you if your mother didn't?"

  The students burst out laughing, and that wild kid added with a grin: "His mom was actually bought by his dad, and she ran off with some carpenter from another town."

  With a burst of laughter, some people spoke up and others laughed. The little girl was overwhelmed with emotion, buried her face in the table and sobbed.

  Everyone stopped laughing and stared with wide eyes, looking at the troublemaker and the teacher who caused the trouble.

  This made Lei Dapeng furious, smoke rising from his seven orifices. He rolled up his sleeves and beckoned with one hand: "Who shouted? Come here, come here, stand in front of the podium, just you, that bald-headed guy, don't think I didn't see you."

  He scolded a few sentences, this ugly thing sometimes works, at least the momentum of firing is shocking. The bald kid in the back row stood nervously on the podium, obviously a troublemaker, with two lumps on his head and several scratch marks on his neck. Lei Dapeng sat down majestically, asked what his name was, and he replied that it was Niu Shuisheng. When asked if he often fought with others, the kid didn't dare deny it. Lei thought to himself that this kid was indeed very clever. He slammed his hand on the desk and scolded: "Just by looking at you, I can tell you're a troublemaker with zero brains, always ranking last in class, right?"

  The whole class burst out laughing, and it turned out that he had guessed correctly. Xiao Tu's face turned red with embarrassment as he lowered his head and scratched the back of his neck, feeling ashamed.

  "Now that Teacher Lei has taught you, it's time for you to learn a lesson."

  Lei Da Peng slapped his hand on the table, with a mighty and powerful momentum, educating this kid in front of the whole class:

  "Getting into fights is okay, kids should be naughty, if they don't grow up to be useless; coming in last place on exams is also okay, your parents didn't give you a smart brain, that's not your problem... But bullying girls is something I will criticize you for. Think back when I was a student, I never bullied girls, only boys, whoever was tough I would bully them, later no one let me bully them, so I started bullying teachers... Bullying classmates and girls doesn't count as an achievement, being able to bully teachers is what counts... Do you understand? Go apologize to Jing Yanyan, be good friends from now on, who knows maybe in the future you'll marry her and bring her back home as your wife... Wouldn't that save you money on buying a wife?"

  The whole class burst out laughing, and the little water-born was so ashamed that he had nowhere to hide. Crying, Jing Yanyan was teased into laughter. Under Teacher Lei's intimidation, this little baldy reluctantly stood in front of Jing Yanyan and apologized. The little girl was also left crying and laughing by what Lei Dapeng said. Blinking away tears, she looked at the teacher with a complex gaze.

  But after all the commotion, it was actually more interesting than the usual dull classes. Many students couldn't help but stare at this unconventional city teacher, seemingly more fascinating than any other teacher they had seen. Little Baldy sat down, eagerly waiting for Teacher Lei Da Peng to start a more exciting lesson.

  Right, and there's class too! Lei Dapeng, facing so many inquiring eyes, suddenly remembered his own identity.

  Lei Dapeng asked, "Where did it get to?" as he flipped through his textbook. He turned to the section on "Sun Quan's Advice on Learning", which was an excerpt from "Zizhi Tongjian" about the story of Shi Zhe San Ri and Guo Ming Xiang Kan. Lei Dapeng knew the story, but when he scanned over the sentence "You should now take charge of affairs... I don't want you to be a doctor who governs through classics", he got stuck immediately. To him, this classical Chinese was like heavenly script written by gods, and it was hard for him to understand.

  Ke Lei Da Peng certainly didn't want this group of little brats to see that Teacher Lei was an old lady on the verge of a nervous breakdown, so he quickly came up with a plan. With a flicker of his eyes, he put on a confident and composed demeanor, as if he had everything under control, and began to lecture from his notes:

  "This is a story from the Three Kingdoms era, it's so short and there's nothing to say, go take a look yourself... Teacher Lei is going to tell you about the Three Kingdoms today... The most awesome person in the Three Kingdoms is called Zhuge Liang, this guy is awesome! I think his intelligence value is 120, martial arts value is 110; life value is 99. The most powerful warrior skill is called Wooden Horse Flowing Chariot, that's one fierce thing, the chariot charges into the enemy formation, swish swish swish swish, cutting off heads like you guys harvesting wheat, in batches... This text also says Sun Quan is an awesome character, martial arts value 110, intelligence value 100, warrior skill... right, Flowing Star Fire Rain, that's the catapult, a stone bigger than a human head, plus some ignited oil, swish swish swish one throw, wherever it goes, that place becomes a sea of fire, just like our mountain fires here, one wave of fire and nothing is left, not even a blade of grass..."

  He spoke with flying colors, his words flowing smoothly, and Lei Dapeng's mind quickly flashed back to the Three Kingdoms game that had once made his blood boil. He added oil and vinegar to the lecture, speaking as if no one was around, and the effect was not bad. These young kids who had never seen the world were stunned, staring with wide eyes, shining with admiration and worship at Teacher Lei, listening to this unprecedented Chinese lesson...

  ……………………

  ……………………

  "Ah, you're having Lei Dapeng substitute teach?"

  Simo Xian's jaw almost dropped when he heard this. Wang Huating, Liu Cuicloud, and Ding Yizhi, who had entered the room together, looked at each other with strange expressions that were hard to describe after hearing Shanyong's words. They all knew that Leiguo was a mule mixed into a horse team, and as soon as he reached a critical position, problems would arise. He couldn't withstand scrutiny at all. If they really taught him until he was completely confused, wouldn't it be laughable?

  Dan Yong, who was cooking lunch, couldn't help but laugh, but he didn't dare to share Leida Peng's ideal with everyone. He lifted the lid of the pot and looked at the steaming rice, smiling: "What's wrong? I think Da Peng is a straightforward person, really like a teacher, maybe even better than me?"

  "Boss, are you kidding me? He can write a dozen wrong characters in just one page of identification book. If you let him substitute for the teacher, won't that mislead the students?" Si Mu Xian said in a low voice, looking embarrassed.

  "This is where you're wrong, Da Peng said this is a reserve team for migrant workers. If they make a mistake again, it's not farming or going out to work... Your hard teaching is just nonsense. You've delayed the children from playing." Dan Yong smiled and said, feeling that sometimes Le Da Peng's words are silly, but they have a kind of spiritual energy, and they're actually true.

  This remark made several people look embarrassed, although the words were rough, but also true. More than half of them are left-behind children, most of whom only study until junior high school graduation and then go out to work to support their families, whether it's parents or students themselves, they've all gotten used to it, and no one pays attention to this aspect, so the teaching quality is naturally very poor.

  Dan Yong cut off the vegetables and turned back, pointing outside the window with a smile: "Look, the relationship between teachers and students is much more harmonious than ours."

  The crowd discussing looked over and saw that Lei Da Peng not only attended class, but also dragged on the lesson. After class, he was surrounded by a group of students asking him questions from left to right. He had a little girl holding his left hand and a bald boy holding his right hand, and he even pushed the two together, letting them hold hands as they walked home. He saw the students off all the way to the school gate, and with great enthusiasm, waved goodbye. The scene was truly one of deep affection between teacher and student.

  After a while, he entered the kitchen and saw everyone looking at him with complicated eyes. Lei Dapeng sat down beside them as if nothing had happened, and, for fear that others wouldn't know how to behave, he casually tossed his textbook onto the table, propped up his legs, and said contentedly:

  "Oh dear, the four lessons just now almost exhausted me...... I've never lectured so much before. Now I feel that being an engineer of human souls is just like having a big meal: it's really refreshing!"

  The thunder arrived, no matter what he said or the expression on his face, everyone was so shocked that they lost their appetite for this meal. Everyone knew that this guy was a broken mouthed fool, and the more you teased him, the more energetic he became, but in the end, nobody paid attention to him anymore.

  But unexpectedly, today's adrenal secretion is excessive, and he didn't care. Lei Dapeng directly said with a new discovery, pulling Si Mu Xian: "Xian brother, do you know? There are many wives in this village who were bought with money, not expensive, only a few thousand yuan. If you graduate and can't find a wife, second brother will buy one for you... This place is too happy, the happiness index is higher than in the city. Wives are so cheap, where else can you find such a good place?"

  This thunder, made Simu Xian a big red face, in the remote mountains, there are indeed many people who can't marry their wives and rely on human traffickers to solve them. Zhuo Ma Township is a disaster-stricken area. However, in Lei Dapeng's eyes, it seems that social progress has become unbearable. Wang Hua Ting scolded him with one sentence, and Lei Dapeng didn't say anything else. After being quiet for a few seconds, he went to ask Class Leader Ding Yizhi again:

  "Class monitor, I think your teaching method is great! You talked about how to liven up the classroom atmosphere and stimulate students' enthusiasm, it was excellent. When I taught the chapter on 'Sun Quan's Advice on Learning', I told them stories from 'The Legend of the Three Kingdoms'. Oh my, the atmosphere was fantastic, everyone was so enthusiastic that no one fell asleep in class."

  Lei fell again, and Shanyu knew that this guy was teaching rural kids about games in class. He didn't dare to expose him, however. Class monitor Ding Yizhi had always been mature and steady, shaking his head and sighing without paying attention to this rascal. Wang Huating couldn't bear it anymore and scolded Lei Dapeng, saying: "You're eating while talking, aren't you afraid of choking?"

  "Don't worry, don't worry... As long as I'm in a good mood, everything can be digested." Lei Dapeng didn't understand the meaning behind her words, but seeing Wang Huating's abnormal gaze, he stopped for a while.

  There is such a thing, everyone's appetite is not good, Lei Dapeng as a student joke is a pile, as a teacher even more can't say, Wang Huating is afraid that if something goes wrong, the countryside will reflect back to the school and it will be embarrassing.

  However, you can't just bluntly tell someone to their face that they're no good at teaching and should quit.

  Class monitor Ding Yizhi didn't dare to, and Wang Huating even more so, the two exchanged a glance, with some difficulty, in this collective, the core leadership was no longer them.

  Everyone has their own worries, so they don't talk much. Le Dapeng's appetite is opened, and he eats two large bowls of dry rice in a row. He even gnaws on the crispy rice crust at the bottom of the pot, praising Egg Brother's cooking skills while eating. This crispy rice crust is golden and fragrant, better than the famous Luoyang Hotel's "Thunderclap". The others not only eat less than Le Dapeng but also slower. Two girls, Ding Yizhi, and Simu Xian haven't finished one bowl yet, while Le Dapeng has already scraped the bottom of the pot. Seeing that there is no fun in chatting, he walks to Single Yong, who is carefully peeling a willow branch after finishing his meal. Before even talking, a bright idea suddenly pops up, and with a gleam in his eye, he blurts out a sentence while chewing:

  "Wow... Egg Brother, I remember what you wanted to eat now."

  This spout, with words and rice, directly sprayed towards Shan Yong. Even though Shan Yong dodged quickly, his shoulder was still sprayed with a patch of white rice flowers. Those few people eating there burst into laughter, and even the usually unflappable Lei was also sprayed...